Pre-Season Warm-Up
I few things to ponder before we get the party started.
A-Rod to the Yankees…
So What? We still have one of the best shortstops in the game and two of the best hitters, and for the first time in years a starting rotation that makes me giddy. Frankly A-Rod doesn’t scare me that much. I can’t explain why but he just doesn’t. I know he’s the reigning MVP and all a mere mortal against us last season and I have a feeling this year he’s going to look even less like the $25 million dollar man. Besides, I have money on either him or Jeter pulling a groin or blowing a knee. Plus the ego clashing and resulting clubhouse unrest will be better than a night at the Real World house during a drunken catfight. But in the end no one really knows what’s going to happen this season but I do have one request for A-Rod and Co…Bring it baby!!! “Cause we’re hungry and you look like prime rib at an all you can eat buffet :P
Getting Schilling
This guy kills me!!! He’s an animal on the field (I just read today how he sent some chin music to my Millar for bringing up a home run he had hit off him like 3 years ago…I’m looking past the fact he nearly injure my boy…this time), does tons of charity work and goes online at random time to talk to the fans. And if that’s not enough he’s now a spokesman for Dunkies. I can only say one thing: Hello My Hero!!!
(sidebar: has anyone noticed the greatest invention in the 21st century??? The new tops on the hot coffee cups at Dunkies that now make it possible to drive at 70 mph on 128 at 7 in the morning and flipping off someone for changing into your lane without a blinker all without spilling the nectar of the morning gods – its kick-ass!)
Follicle Challenge
For the love of god what has happened to my boys heads? Johnny/Jesus/Mr. Mojo Risin’ looks like he wandered onto the field from a local biker bar. And Pedro? He looks like an extra from “Coming to America” and had his head dipped in Soul Glow. But then again if they win 120 games they could have pink Mohawks for all I care. Although I do relish in the fact that they are Steinbrenner’s worst nightmare…he, he, he – well that and a Red Sox fan marring one of his sons in order to infiltrate the family and eventually leading a hostile takeover of the team and relegating him to towel boy duty.
Reality TV
What the hell!!! I’ll sign up for a reality show and humiliate myself in front of millions if it means I get to spend the day with Tim Wakefield!!! And I can tell you I’d be a lot more impressed that the chick on “Average Joe”. However, justice was served when she got dumped for dating Fabio. But then again the restraining order might put the kibosh on that scheme…I mean ‘idea’.
The Patriots
Twice in three years? This sh#t doesn’t happen to New England fans. We should still be wallowing in our Sam Adams from when we should have lost 2 years ago. But we won…again…miracles will never cease. Some people have therapists; Red Sox fans have the Patriots to keep us from throwing ourselves off the Tobin Bridge. Was I the only person after the Super Bowl who was wondering if Kraft could buy the Sox, Bellichick could manage the team and if Brady could throw a 95 mph fastball….ok, maybe it was just me. Oh and another thing, could someone please explain to me the logic of turning over cars in the streets and causing riots in the middle of the city because our team WON? Losing maybe…
April 9th
April 9th is Good Friday. There is nothing wrong with telling your boss you’re taking the day off for religious reasons….after all it a holy day, its OPENING DAY!!!
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